💪 Sport Flicks 🏆

Looking back on it, sports-themed movies are the most homoerotic films known to man--not a big surprise considering that they are practically drenched in testosterone. I didn't realize this until my teenage years when it became readily apparent that both my Mom and I LOVED Jean Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal movies for the same reasons... none of which were the acting, that's for damn sure! 😆

🏈  Little Giants (1994)

I remember seeing this movie at Kevin & Jeff's 2nd grade sleepover. It's a classic formula: rag-tag band of unathletic misfits go through a few training montages to magically defeat the best team out there. In a special twist, the best Footballer of them all is a girl nicknamed "ICE-BOX." 🌬 But for me, it was all about teen heartthrob, Devon Sawa!

🏀  White Men Can't Jump (1992)

"MOOKIE!" 🤣 I LOVE this movie because my brother and I practically grew up on the Basketball courts, even though I was usually videotaping on the sidelines. When "Black-As-Night" Wesley Snipes and "Wonder Bread" Woody Harrelson join forces with Rosie Perez, it's movie magic.

⚾️  A League of Their Own (1992)

YASSSSS!! 💁 Truly one of the ultimate Girl Power movies, the cast is a veritable Who's Who of queer icons: Madonna, Geena Davis, Rosie O'Donnell, and Lori Petty. It's refreshing to see strong independent women hold their own in any male-dominated field... Even if it is boring-ass baseball. #DirtInTheSkirt!

⚽️  Ladybugs (1992)

"Looks like Norman Bates is playing soccer!" "...After the game: No Showers." 😱🔪 Before She's the Man, there was Ladybugs! Teen heartthrob Jonathan Brandis dons a wig and a skirt for this soccer romp starring comedian Rodney Dangerfield and the FABULOUS Jackée Harry. 💁 It re-enforces every teen movie cliché, most laughably the idea that eyeglasses and a ponytail can make an otherwise beautiful girl look hideous. 🙄🙄🤢

🏒  D3: The Mighty Ducks (1996)

FUN FACT: At age 12, I received a Cease & Desist email from Vincent A. LaRusso's girlfriend after I leaked his Boston University email address, which was undoubtedly blown up by dozens of fanboys and girls. Even though D3 is universally regarded as the weakest installment of the Mighty Ducks trilogy, the film spotlights Vincent's character as the posh rich kid is recruited for the Varsity Hockey Team over his Duck counterparts. Not to mention the intense fight scene between him and teen dream Joshua Jackson (Dawson's Creek).

⛸  The Cutting Edge (1992)

Two years before the 

Tonya Harding-Nancy Kerrigan Olympic Scandal, this film exposed the ugly politics around Professional Figure Skating. Opposite worlds collide when washed-up Olympians  Kate (the Ice Queen) and Doug (the Hockey Player) join forces in a last ditch effort to attain their former glory.

🥊  Rocky IV (1985)

Guess I've always been a fan of guys beating the hell out of each other. 👊 But in the franchise's darkest moment, former champion Apollo Creed is killed in the ring by Soviet robot, Ivan Drago (played by Dolph Lundgren). Of course, it's up to Apollo's friend/rival Rocky Balboa to avenge his death in an epic ring battle. Although unrealistic, it's quite satisfying to watch Sly Stallone tear the perfect Aryan specimen apart.

🥋  Berry Gordy's The Last Dragon (1985)

The Last Dragon is the first movie I ever remember seeing (at age 3) and it had a HUGE impact on me. I was instantly attracted to both the male and female lead characters. My personality formed as an amalgamation of both soft-spoken gentleman Taimak and sassy sex kitten Vanity. As a kid, it meant a lot to me to see beautiful and tough Black actors carrying their own movie; it inspired my lifelong dream of becoming a Director. 🎬

🤼‍♂️ Vision Quest (1985)

Before his villainous turn in Netflix's Stranger Things, Matthew Modine starred in this cheesy coming-of-age wrestling drama. Although I appreciate the film's gratuitous use of slow-motion Greco-Roman action, the real star of the show is young Madonna in her feature film debut (performing "Crazy for You" and "Gambler"). 🎤🌈

🏌  Happy Gilmore (1996)

Adam Sandler achieves the impossible by making golf somewhat exciting. Honestly, the only scene I remember from this one is Gilmore's hilarious brawl with beloved game show host, Bob Barker. "The Price is Wrong, BITCH!" 💰🤣🤣

🏁  Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006)

I know, I know, I really don't consider NASCAR a sport. 🏎 As usual, Will Ferrell plays the loveable idiot in this one. It earns a spot on my favorites list because it makes the best Scientology joke. "Save me, Tom Cruise! Save me with your crazy voodoo magic!" 🔮