🙅‍♂️🍌 it, PhotoBucket!

I can barely summon the words to describe this utter RIDICULOUSNESS. As some readers will notice, 90% of the pre-2009 original images on this blog have disappeared, replaced with placeholders. These placeholders are courtesy of Photobucket, my former image host, who is now charging suckers an arm and a leg for third party image hosting—basically the ability to post pics/vids on external websites.

The funny thing is, PB most definitely could’ve gotten away with this bullshit in the 90s, back in Geocities and AngelFire’s heyday, when PB was literally the ONLY free online bulk photo/video storage provider. But nowadays, all web hosting services charge minimal annual fees for domain renewal, allocating hundreds of gigabytes for photos/music/video storage at no extra charge. 

To put things in perspective, I pay Google $10 annually to operate the Big Top Blog. And yet PhotoBucket wants to charge $100 a year just to store & share images. The target demographic must be someone who needs to store massive amounts of photos and videos but does not own any modern technology (a smartphone/laptop/tablet). 🙄🙄

#BoomBoyByeFoom

JUST ADD ALCOHOL: “兩個爸爸 (Two Fathers)”

My latest Netflix binge, “兩個爸爸 (Two Fathers)” is a Taiwanese dramedy series about two college roommates who unknowingly impregnate the same girl. Since clearly The Maury Povich Show isn’t a thing in Taiwan, the mystery woman skips town immediately after giving birth, bequeathing the newborn baby to both possible baby daddies. 👨‍👨‍👧 Hilarity ensues.

TAKE A DRINK WHEN:

🐑 A Stuffed Sheep is shown

🖼 A Portrait of Wen Di, Papa, and Daddy is shown

📜 Cohabitation Rules are shown

🛌 Anyone’s bedroom is shown

👽 Anyone calls Ms Wu an Alien

🤪 Ms Wu does something weird

😛 A woman hits on Zhen Hua

💐 Someone wraps flowers

🥘 Someone is cooking

🍚 Someone eats rice and/or fish

🎣 Someone goes fishing

👕 Clothes with random American sayings or vintage brands

👖 Tang Hsiang Shi isn’t wearing a suit

🛀 Someone is told to brush his/her teeth or take a bath

💁‍♂️ Tang Hsiang Shi calls Jing Zhu (Ms Fang) a man or “Ms Side View Mirror”

🙅‍♀️ Ying Fan (Ms Jiang) is bitchy

🤬 Tang Hsiang Shi or Mei Nu gets pissed at Zheng Xiong

🤬 Anyone gets mad at Tang Hsiang Shi or vice versa

🚛 Interior of Han Fang Car Service is shown

🛒 Interior of grocery store is shown

💍 Anyone gives Fei Zhu advice on women

✍️ Wen Di draws something

🌚 Anyone says “Blackie”

🤭 Grandpa gets too REAL with Wen Di

TAKE A SHOT FOR:

🗣 Random English dialogue

💃🏻 Rule #5: Don’t Fall for the Same Woman

🎸 Every time a character is rocking out to the show’s own theme song (Lin Yo-Wei’s “Happy Voice”)

🧚‍♂️ “Peter Pan” references

📱 Product Placement

🌺 The Warm Flower billboard

🙄 Unnecessary/Redundant Subtitles

🌈 Latent Homoerotic Moments

🤯 Infuriatingly Homophobic Moments

😘 Sexual tension between 2 characters

🏀 A character plays or watches a sport

🚘 The “Bad Driver” stereotype

🎥 Melodramatic cinematography/Slow Motion/Freeze Frames/Flashbacks

🤧 Wen Di learns a life lesson as sappy background music plays

💨 A Series Regular is absent for the entire episode