Are You Busy Right Now?

Original Air Date: 08.25.2004
Opening Song: "Breathe On Me" - Britney Spears

A disturbing telephone call took me away from my Will & Grace repeat. It was the school drama director, Mr. LeFrancois, and he kept asking me if I would be busy and if I wanted to be... this is not a fun game. I finally caved in and said, "not really." He asked me to come down to the school since he just found out that organizations were allowed to set up camp in the main hallway. He had one other willing volunteer. Great. I had a measly twenty minutes to make myself beautiful for the second time, but I succeeded.

I arrived at the school at the exact moment that Carolyn and Chelsey reached the side entrance. I was extremely surprised to see Carolyn... Chelsey's the worker bee so I expected nothing less. To make things even better, Super Mouse Shannon's ride pulled up right behind mine. It was like a reunion (Wow, I haven't seen you in... almost two weeks!).

After having to slip my 300% Cotton Dionysus Club t-shirt over my skimpy DKNY tee, I mingled with the younguns and a lot of adults too. Of course, Amber's mom was there and had to tell me ALL about her baby girl. She also expected my mom to really participate in the Music Boosters. Yeah, that'll happen, lady. (My mom has a longer day than I do!)

Anyway... Steve-O popped up out of nowhere 'cause apparently he was giving tours. Marianne, Jeff, Morris, Kate, and some other familiar faces showed up too. Steve's now an architect working for the School Board (and he's 17!). I still work at the Commissary on Fort Meade, strictly for tips; they accused me of being a man-whore after seeing my wad of 1's and 5's.

"We need tourists, stat! Come on!" the PTA mom shouted at Shannon, Carolyn, and me. We came a-running and Carolyn and I teamed up to show the visitors around the school. We took them up, down, and all-around, showing them the most important sites: "there's the child development room, to the right there's some genuine abstesos and up ahead is a ceiling tile about to um... kill us both." Fascinating. And our tour group was so slow (they were slackin') and Carolyn and I are speed-walkers, capable of weaving through mall traffic.

Apparently, Marianne (another tour guide) was trying to accommodate the hearing-impaired visitors 'cause we could hear her EVERYWHERE WE WENT! After all the excitement died down, Chelsey took Carolyn, John, and me home in the party van. Normally, I won't even get into cars when someone younger than me is behind the wheel-- oh hell, as long as it isn't E.J. (between applying the mascara and singing along with the radio, he'd be way too busy to watch the road).

What have I learned from it all? 1.) Jessika enjoys "tadpoling" it, 2.) I look like Jimi Hendrix without the 'fro, 3.) John's pregnant with Todd's babies. (Now that he's been knocked up, he better not even think about asking me to plan some shotgun wedding, okay!)