Theme Song: "Boy" - Book Of Love
After days of preparation, I'm finally ready for ALLIES' Gender Bender Dance: I've borrowed a slinky, ultra-short dress from my sister; my mom and I've picked out some sexxy strappy shoes from Payless (that was a new experience, LOL), and I've bought my boobs (Fantastic 4 balls) at The Dollar Store. I still have a long black wig from the summer of '02; y'know, when I actually wanted to film my first feature-length horror film, Electric Moon. And before I get started, I'd like to thank the 60-year-old cashier at CVS for NOT asking any questions as he rung up my sparkly blue nail polish, eye pencils, eye shadow, concealer, and cotton candy-flavored lip gloss.
Once I'm finished running around back and forth between the drug store, Schmucker, and the Majestic Theater (to take Spectrum photos), I head back to the dorm, paint my nails (slooowly), shower, shave EVERYWHERE ('cept down there), shimmy into my dress without popping the zipper, slip on my 3-inch heels, and get Sean's final approval. "You're definitely gonna win," he tells me. And of course, I tell him that I'm out for blood 'cause I did not dress up as a woman for nothin'. Okay.
Quote of the Night: "It takes more balls to wear a dress for an hour than to wear a suit for thirty years." - Peter Paige, Queer as Folk
I head downstairs, being cheered on along the way by Julian & the girls ("Wow, he's got better legs than me!"), and I find Emily and give her my CVS bag of makeup. She gets excited, blends the makeup in on my face and helps me do my eyes. Debra and another curious onlooker watch the transformation. In the end, one of them says I look like Tina Turner... I just think I look like the Black Barbie. Once Emily's finished, Katelin & Bill come in and give me the thumbs up. BTW, my boobs are Bill-approved, LOL. Really, Sean says they make me a 32C, just so you have a mental picture.
Once I'm all purrty, I hug my girls, grab my dollar store purse, and walk the 5 blocks to the Attic, my high heels scraping the pavement the entire time. I arrive at the club and Jai greets me at the registration desk. Since dressing up in guy clothes isn't a big change for her, she wears a pink shirt with a black skirt; plus, she wears makeup and lipstick. Very pretty. As I sign up for the contest, scary Morgan-in-a-dress runs up to me and yells, "Bitch, how could you?" Um, Ahhh. I would respond but I'm in shock 'cause he looks like a cross between one of the Sorority Boys and Cindy Lou-Who (and that's his real hair).
I saunter in and sit on my usual bar stool, crossing my legs like a dainty little lady while Erin keeps the drinks comin'. I'm not sitting there for very long since the DJ plays a lot of hot dance songs; not surprising since Jai and I've spent the past few days together mixing CDs for him to play. It's funny how I have more fun dancing than usual doing cartwheels, kicks, spins, and stomps in heels; maybe it's 'cause I feel taller and I don't have to stop myself from dancing like a giddy little schoolgirl. This is crystal clear when he plays Shakira's "Hips Don't Lie" and I swivel my hips and pop my ass like a voluptuous latin temptress without feeling like I need therapy.
Hmmm, The downside of alcohol: about 90 minutes into the dance, this bitch pushes me out of nowhere. He's like, "What were you doin' with my man last night?!" And I'm like, "Whateva'." I am a lady, you fucking cunt; it's a good thing I have balance or else I would fallen right over in those shoes. *sigh* After a while, you can't help but get into the part I guess, LOL. The only bad thing about a GBD is the fact that I'm meeting a lot of people yet I have no idea who they really are. There's this one latin guy-girl that's so smokin' hot, I'm thinking, "Guy or not, I just might have to take you home." *bites fist* Torture!
In the end, I do win Best Guy-turned-Girl (OW-OW!). Will wins 2nd place. Sharita wins Best Girl-turned-Guy. The cowboys win Best Couple. During the last half hour of the dance, Mark shows up (not dressed up *Tisk, tisk*) and we talk at the bar for a little bit. He shows me photos of his friends (namely Kurt) on his picture phone. Too bad I can barely hear a word he says in the incredibly noisy bar. Overall, the dance is a BIG success because at least 150 people attend and they all come from different groups (BSU, frats, O&N, etc), not just ALLIES, which is awesome. I leave a little after midnight and make the long walk home with my feet begging for air; of course, the first thing I do when I get home is take off those damn shoes and tell Emily about my victory.
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